you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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