I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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