As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
