so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
