return my video game
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize