How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
