you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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