She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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