Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
