gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it ðŸ˜
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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