i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
