I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
