The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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