I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm sobbing to NWA
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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