No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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