guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
