I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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