She said her name was "party"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
How does one acquire holy water?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
