I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
