is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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