so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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