I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
