zippers are such a cool invention
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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