I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
