I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
