I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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