the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
