So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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