So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
