I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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