i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
