if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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