Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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