All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
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