awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
