Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
