Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
