Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
