Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
