Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
