I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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