I'm eating all of the evidence.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
time to smoke my breakfast
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
