can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
