You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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