he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
