Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
This is my gift to your gina
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
