I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
someone owes me an orgasm
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
