Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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