I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
