Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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