i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He better not be in your backpack
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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